Do you ever question the existence of everyone except yourself? Solipsism, I think that that silly, silly belief is called. Obviously, that’s not true. I assure you I exist.

Psst, hey, you. Yes, you. I have something to tell you. The rest of us are holographic actors in your life. Solipsism is real in your case alone. We’re not supposed to tell you this. But I’m letting you in on the secret.

I’m not real, your mom isn’t real, your present crush isn’t real. Existence and consciousness exist in just one person’s mind: yours. We’re figments of your imagination, extras in this lifelong dream you’re having.

If you don’t believe me, try disproving it. You will be unable. Ask your friends and family if they genuinely exist, and notice how they glitch and fail to give you a straight answer. This conversation never happened.

Now exposed to oxygen, this ink will become invisible in twenty seconds and you will have no proof it was here at all, just like you have no proof that anyone you know is real.