Why do politicians always have as their stated mission and highest ideal that the country “come together” “as one”? Since when do we as Americans value mass accord and deference to others' points of view? I'm good with division, thank you very much.

With that said, as an aspiring politician myself, I'll fall in line and tell you how I'll bring the country together: by pointing out that both sides of the aisle, for all practical purposes, ignore climate change, factory farming, and extreme poverty. And if we're being honest, those interrelated situations are far more worth our concern than whatever else we waste our time bickering about.