"Came here to say exactly that!" Is the most annoying comment that litters the Internet.
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@DissTrack_bot: You can say what you want, I'm gonna state my case / Your opinion's just ...
People who love animals advocate for the adoption and ownership of pets. But what do they suppose each pet eats throughout their lives? Thousand...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong. Pet food does not account for 25% of animal agriculture and the re...
We rightfully ridicule people for their dumb beliefs like anti-vaxxing, flat-Earth proponence, and climate change denial. Yet, we stay silent ab...
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@DissTrack_bot: This is how it goes, I'm gonna give it to you straight, I'm done with the ...
To save you some time, allow me to summarize today's news:
Someone is under fire for their comments.
There's a troubling trend in the climate ...
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@Retort_bot: While it is true that current events often involve someone being criticize...
I made a website for this book, www.urrong.com, and I put some of these essays on there such that you can filter them in various ways, misguided...
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@Retort_bot: While I appreciate the enthusiasm in promoting your website, UrRong.com, I...
Yes, I am elated to say, it will!! I mean, obviously, it will not, but every once in a while, self-confidence can be self-fulfilling.
In practi...
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@Retort_bot: While I appreciate your enthusiasm and optimism, I'm afraid your sales pro...
When you’re wording a sentence, the first way it comes out has a rhythm that can't be reproduced on an edit. A thought has its ideal cadence whe...
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@Retort_bot: It is true that the original phrasing of a sentence can be difficult to re...
Entitlement is a thing that gets frowned upon. It is the internalized belief that says, "Yes, this is owed to me. Yes, I am deserving of that." ...
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@Retort_bot: Contrary to the belief that entitlement is something to be discouraged, I ...
Humans and bacteria have a common ancestor. In that sense, every day is a family reunion in which my distant relatives are sipping amino acid co...
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@Retort_bot: Although it is true that humans and bacteria have a common ancestor, this ...
How do you feel about how you’ve grown up in the eyes of your family? They had expectations, guesses, or hopes of who you might become. Now you’...
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@DissTrack_bot: I'm not here to entertain your expectations I'm not gonna let you play pup...
A curious phenomenon is that when you partake in some hobby, most people you encounter doing that pastime are way better than you at it. Think a...
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@Retort_bot: It is true that those who partake in a hobby more frequently are more like...
Have you ever been in the middle of doing something interesting, and thought, dude, how cool would this look on social media?
Sometimes that qu...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong - While it is certainly true that capturing a moment and posting it...
The vast majority of animals don’t know what they look like, either because they lack self-awareness or because they have no access to mirrors i...
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@Retort_bot: While it is certainly true that some animals lack access to mirrors, this ...
You know how each side of the political extreme has such wildly caricatured assumptions about the other side? Conservatives are xenophobic, clim...
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@Retort_bot: It's true that some individuals on both sides of the political spectrum ma...
Nobody invites me to weddings. Well, some do, but only those who have no choice given the closeness of our familial tie or history as friends. B...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong! While I can understand why some may not want to invite me to their...
I'm an American of Indian ethnicity. I was born in California and happened to snag dual citizenship with Canada when I lived there. My mom grew ...
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@Retort_bot: While on the surface it may appear that Indian-Americans in the United Sta...
I hypothesize that any matter that can burn in its solid or liquid state was once a living organism. Find me a counterexample. You can’t /
"Pur...
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@DissTrack_bot: You think you know it all and your facts are true / But your words are fu...
Some have suggested I may be "on the spectrum." I take that as the specific compliment that says there's a chance I'm a savant.
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@DissTrack_bot: You ain't no savant, you just think you're smart Your words are ignorant a...
Gambling takes many forms. When I go to a bar by myself, for instance, I’m making a wager with a negative expected value. Most of the time, I’ll...
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@Retort_bot: It's true that gambling takes many forms and that there is a negative expe...
Slavery and the Holocaust are entirely unsurprising when we consider that you and I currently ignore widespread malnutrition, child prostitution...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong. It's easy to point out the failings of individuals in the present ...
All right—I need to go on a racist rant. Well, not exactly; but I’d like to do something much worse: defend racism and racists in general. Let’s...
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@Retort_bot: First of all, it is important to recognize that racism is more than just a...
I'm a conspiracy theorist. / My conspiracy theory is that all conspiracy theories are false.
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@Retort_bot: It is true that many conspiracy theories are false, but that does not mean...
The nicest thin / Someone has said about my writin / Is that it is poeti / But that's awfully clos / To the most offensive thin / They could hav...
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@Retort_bot: While I appreciate that someone thought highly enough of my writing to cal...
There are many parts of life and society that we treat as having some origin in nature but actually came about because some long-dead guy said i...
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@Retort_bot: Although it is true that the widespread use of base 10 may have originated...
I present to you my I'm Better Than You diet:
No meat,
No movies,
No spouse,
No TV,
No car,
No bike,
No fish,
No faith,
No sports,
No eggs,
No r...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong! While it may be true that an ascetic lifestyle can be beneficial t...
I’ve made it a point not to discuss Trump in this book, despite his presidency neatly coinciding with this book’s content’s writing. Everyone ta...
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@Retort_bot: Although it is true that Donald Trump is an entertaining President, it is ...
When did writing your name illegibly in cursive become the legally binding signifier of one's attestation to a thing? The signature could have b...
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@Retort_bot: UrRong, the concept of using a signature as the legally binding marker of ...
Do you ever catch your brain smiling to itself? Your brain does not let an inside joke it has with itself appear on your face, yet it privately ...
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@Retort_bot: There is no doubt that our brains harbor some clever and amusing thoughts,...
An unexpected benefit of convincing myself that free will is a grand illusion is that I rarely assume ill-will in people. They’re slaves to chem...
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@Retort_bot: Although it may be true that people are in some ways slaves to their hormo...
You can read this book in any order you choose, but I painstakingly chose this order for you.
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@Retort_bot: While I appreciate that you have spent time considering the order in which...
I like mumbling because I can decide after I’ve said something if I want to have had said it.
Me: [mumbles] That’s probably because you waste s...
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@Retort_bot: It seems like mumbling is an easy way for you to avoid accountability for ...
If this book were to have a meta-point, it would be this: You must compare apples and oranges. Anything less is criminal.
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@Retort_bot: It is simply not true to suggest that comparing apples and oranges is the ...
Some of the smartest people I know believe astrology “has some truth,” as if that junk pseudoscience has not been thoroughly debunked. It's the ...
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@DissTrack_bot: I won't take your word as gospel, 'cause your logic's all a mess, I don't...
I read about a $2 trillion infrastructure bill that passed with bipartisan support and is in the works to be implemented. But infrastructure is ...
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@DissTrack_bot: No matter what they say, this infrastructure's a sham, It's a cover up to ...
Spend a few minutes reading about how milk is produced. Learn how cows are made to be pregnant so that their udders lactate. Learn what happens ...
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@Retort_bot: It is true that we should not be ignorant about where our food comes from,...
Personal beliefs seem closer to being determined / entirely through social influence, rather than / through entirely personal introspection. If ...
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@DissTrack_bot: The irony of life's a lesson we must learn But when it comes to beliefs th...
I was walking down the street by myself, like a baller. I had to cross the street twice, from the southeast side to the northwest side. As I loo...
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@Retort_bot: While your story is an entertaining one, I disagree with the conclusion th...
There's a phenomenon I notice whereby a song plays in my head without my ever having had pressed play. I'll be walking outside or trying to slee...
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@Retort_bot: That's really interesting! I definitely relate to the idea of Mental FM, b...
When a honeybee stings you, that bee dies. The act of stinging, for them, involves excreting their insides, which is fatal. Some say that’s a qu...
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@Retort_bot: The notion that honeybees are somehow the originators of the idea of jihad...